Bad Movie Birthday

"Steve in Manhattan" (blogenfreude01)
11/21/2015 at 16:17 • Filed to: None

The tradition started when a friend took me to see the very first Star Trek movie for my birthday. It blew. (Spoiler: the bad guy is a probe). So the tradition started of having friends over and watching bad movies on or around November 10th.

Two years ago we watched Sucker Punch , Red Riding Hood , and Green Lantern . In one sitting. All horrible in their own peculiar way.

So now I’m contemplating bad movies for the next session - the get together will have to wait until December now. Suggestions? It has to be a major studio movie (no The Room , for instance), preferably less than 10 years old.

Oh, and I’m watching !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! right now. Awful. Bad script, bad acting, sex scenes that aren’t sexy, and the plot (she’s going to be his submissive) doesn’t get going until you’re a third of the way in. And B&D leaves marks (don’t ask me how I know this).

Why do I punish myself?

DISCUSSION (38)

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:24

50 shades of grey was such a waste........

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:26

Come on, you have to watch The Room. It is the Bell curve incarnate, a perfect storm of bad ideas and bad decisions that make it the most entertaining movie I have seen in ages. It has literally changed my life for the better. Thank you, Tommy Wiseau.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:33

The Big Hit

The Hobbit movies Middle-Earth Porn train-wrecks

Twilight series?

Steve in Manhattan > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
11/21/2015 at 16:35

I know I do, but it doesn’t qualify for BMB. And I’ve seen all 3 Sharknados. I’ve seen I Spit On Your Grave, both of them (remake was better). I’ve seen both versions of Old Boy. I’ve seen more bad Korean horror movies than I can count. I’ve seen Phantom Menace 3 times. I paid cash American to see AI in a theater (and no, it doesn’t get better with age, and yes, there was booing when the end credits rolled). I’ve seen A View to a Kill and Die Another Day - two very bad James Bond movies.

And 50 Shades is nearly over - she’s a submissive who spends half the movie ordering her dominant around. That’s not the way it works.

Steve in Manhattan > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
11/21/2015 at 16:36

How were you forced to see it? Did someone cuff you to a chair?

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:39

Gave the girlfriend the choice of what to see

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
11/21/2015 at 16:46

I have seen all 3 Hobbit movies - the GF is a fan. They were better than the LOTR series (which she made me buy) but that’s not saying anything. All I could think during them was - I could get 20 minutes out of this easily. But that’s Peter Jackson - if it’s not nearly as long as Schindler’s List he doesn’t think he’s done his job.

Thought of Twilight, and also the 2 Atlas Shrugged movies, which were panned.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:48

If you can find it, Hard Ticket to Hawaii.

Or Atlantic Rim.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:52

What!? The LoTR are truly great films. Have you watched the extended cuts at all? Yes, they are very long. But there is a bunch of stuff that makes them great films when added back in..

The Hobbit films should have been only 1 movie, and are very much just fan-service for Middle Earth fans; of which PJ is king.

The Big Hit is a great terrible movie. You should really look for it.

Steve in Manhattan > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
11/21/2015 at 16:52

Yeah, that’s how I sat through a Jennifer Aniston/Kevin Costner piece of shit back in 2006.

What was her opinion of 50 Shades?

And shit, they so set if up for a sequel.

Did you catch what kind of car he gave her? I was just listening during that part and didn’t have the stones to rewind and make it last even longer.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 16:57

was an overall ‘meh’ from her as well...I don’t remember a thing about the movie anymore (thankfully)

Alfalfa > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 17:00

Pacific Rim, if you haven’t already. As Honest Trailers says, it’s either the dumbest awesome movie ever made, or the most awesome dumb movie ever made.

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
11/21/2015 at 17:09

LOTR pissed me off because they could have been shorter, and that story could have been told in one 160 minute movie or two 90 minute movies. Not that length is a bad thing, but Gravity was 91 minutes long and packed a serious punch. I always admire a filmmaker who can tell a compelling story in a reasonable amount of time. Unless fate intervenes again, we’ll see SPECTRE tomorrow. At 148 minutes it’s the longest Bond film yet - we’ll see if it’s worth it.

And thanks - as soon as I looked at the IMDB for The Big Hit and saw 3 words I knew it would be awful. Those words? Lou Diamond Phillips. He is the Andie MacDowell of B movies.

Steve in Manhattan > Alfalfa
11/21/2015 at 17:24

I have seen it. I will watch anything with Ydris Elba in it. It was Transformers with a better script. At least it didn’t suffer from the Godzilla problem (you rarely saw the monsters fighting). And it wasn’t as awful as Prometheus - a promising start, then otherwise smart people taking off their helmets and touching things where they had no idea what they were. Ridley Scott is working on yet another Alien prequel , but I hold out little hope it’ll be good despite a great cast.

Steve in Manhattan > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
11/21/2015 at 17:28

Oh - did you see what kind of car he gave her?

Steve in Manhattan > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest.
11/21/2015 at 17:34

Wow - Hard Ticket is not yet available on Netflix, but there’s a $22 director’s cut DVD on Amazon. Not sure I want to pull that trigger.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 17:54

no sir

Steve in Manhattan > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras
11/21/2015 at 18:14

I’d figure it out, but then I’d have to watch it again. No thank you.

You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 18:24

Dusk to Dawn and the sequels are horrible yet entertaining vampire flicks. We didn’t realize the first one was a vampire flick til halfway through when things go sideways. It's got Quentin Tarantino, George Clooney and Salma Hayek and it's amazing

http://m.imdb.com/title/tt011636…

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Alfalfa
11/21/2015 at 18:24

You shut your whore mouth! Pacific Rim is amazing. It’s giant gawddamn robots fighting giant gawddamn monsters! What the fuck else do you need in a movie!?

(i may be slightly intoxicated at the time of my typing this)

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 18:25

The Big Hit is a truly great, terrible movie.

Alfalfa > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
11/21/2015 at 18:44

My 12 year old self wants nothing more. But my 27 year old self would like a little less cliches and more continuity in the key plot points.

911e46z06 > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 19:02

Surf Nazis Must Die

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 19:07

No, definitely not worth $22, but there are other ways.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Alfalfa
11/21/2015 at 19:07

Your 27 year old self is a square. The 12 year old has a much better grasp on expectations.

Steve in Manhattan > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest.
11/21/2015 at 22:47

Educate me ...

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 22:52

Torrent and:

https://kat.cr/hard-ticket-to…

Steve in Manhattan > You can tell a Finn but you can't tell him much
11/21/2015 at 22:52

Holy shit - how did I not know about these movies? A cornucopia of awful Must. See.

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
11/21/2015 at 22:56

I am a bit drunk, but I can still say Pacific Rim was a disappointment. No plot structure, no continuity, no ... ugh, just a big loud monster movie with no through line. Why do they need 2 melded minds to run a killer robot? They are technologically advanced - maybe build robots that one person can run? Or autonomous robots that fight the monsters on their own? This movie was a mess - fun to watch mess, but still a mess.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 22:57

Stop thinking so much and watch the pretty colors.

Steve in Manhattan > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest.
11/21/2015 at 22:58

Thanks. My credo has always been to pay for content, but if they make it impossible for me to get it, I might just go rogue.

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
11/21/2015 at 23:05

Alright OK ... so a big budget movie looks pretty and is a tale told by an idiot (sadly this time, it’s Guillermo del Toro), full of sound and fury signifying nothing. Just take my money, but at least put it in a theater where the seats recline and I can get a decent IPA. Because what are we - barbarians?

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 23:11

Sigh...

You should really work on that whole “willing suspension of disbelief” thing.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Steve in Manhattan
11/21/2015 at 23:15

I do a good chunk of both. I probably have like 500+ purchased CDs as well as a huge collection of downloaded tracks, for example.

Steve in Manhattan > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
11/21/2015 at 23:56

Dunno - that movie and Prometheus did me in ... if you’ve got $200 million to make a movie, it should be great. I can’t even ....

Steve in Manhattan > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest.
11/22/2015 at 00:47

We should consult on this ... my collection has largely been given away but for the blurays. I need content, methinks.

pip bip - choose Corrour > Steve in Manhattan
11/22/2015 at 02:26

you need to watch the Australian movie Houseboat Horror.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Steve in Manhattan
11/22/2015 at 10:30

Another thing I do is I’ll pirate something, then if I like it, I’ll buy it later.